Wednesday, 13 June 2007

my toenails

My toenails came off yesterday! Painted a nice summery pink, apart from the fact that they are no longer attached to my feet, they are in perfect condition.

I put the situation out to tender today - what to do with Jess' toenails?? And I have to say, I was impressed by the calibre of suggestions.

The one that first struck a cord, was to create a Damien Hirst-style interest piece for our flat, involving a sort of animal/human fusion foot.

The second suggestion was initially disappointing - make a christmas angel with a toenail-halo. You see, these are not feeble strips of toenail suited to halo-making, but whole nails that are almost rhombus by dimension.

But the suggestion got me thinking... The Hatcher family is somewhat poor in terms of nativity scene characters, but what better addition to our current feeble collection than a bishop, reigning supreme, with a pink rhombus-shaped bishop's hat?!

In all honesty, I'm not sure either of these suggestions is entirely viable. The good Mr Scott might have something to say if I were to start decorating his lovely new batchelor pad with ex-bodily appendages, and equally, the elderly german relative might take offence were she expected to kneel for a dead toenail.

Thus, further suggestions most welcome. Until that time, I shall continue to keep them in my special pot.

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